At the water's edge

"I can't do this anymore. It's over" There's a finality in her voice that really drives the point home. "Surely you must have seen this coming?"

I tell her I have. That i'm sorry. I really tried this time, honest to god, i did.

"Just stop it, ok? Please, just stop." she tells me, her make up streaming. "It doesn't matter. Not now. Not anymore" I've never seen her this cold, and I caused it. "There's no sense dragging whatever it was that we had out any longer."

Then she's gone. Just me alone by the lake side. The only cloud in the sky is hanging above my head, dark and angry.

This time it was my fault. I was a liar. One so completely full of shit that i started to believe it myself. An asshole, selfish, and hyporcitical. Yes, i was all these things, and so much more. What's that saying about good intentions? I kneel down by the water's edge and prepare my biggest confesion.

On the lake's surface I see my reflection. But in it I am younger. Before the tattoos, drugs, sex, all of it. I stare into the eyes of disappointment. Tears flow freely and i don't care. If this is the last time i am to fell anything, i want to savor it.

I remove my shirt and gently rub my chest. I close my eyes and grit my teeth as i tear away the skin, muscle, tissue, and bone. With one swift motion i grab my heart and tear it out to examine it. I'll be damned...a heart really can be broken. The mass i hold in my hand is black, riddled with cuts and bruises. It's amazing it could function through all the scar tissue..

I'm sorry...

"It's over."

The wounded mound is still beating as i place it through the reflection in the water. I stand and walk away, leaving the sun to set on this day and the stupid boy i just gave up on being.