The first time i ever finger-banged a chick was in my truck Now, since this was my first time i had a few things to learn. Like don't eat finger foods 24 hours after and, more importantly, that the smell of a really dirty pussy will LINGER! I drove my dad somewhere three days after my little adventure and my truck was still really ripe. We drove for about fifteen minutes in total silence.
Dad:(with a look of absolute disgust on his face) What on earth is that smell?
I looked at him for a moment before responding, "dad if you don't know by now, i'm not tellin ya!" The end.
Pep talk with dad!
This was his advice after i had a really traumatic breakup.
"Date ugly girls. The pretty ones will always find someone better than you and move on. At least when the uglies do this, who cares?"
(insert your one witty coment here cuz that was one of the only times in my life that i was speechless)
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