Ok, I've kinda been putting this off...

A couple of weeks ago I attended a writer's conference in Grapevine. The only reason I wanted to attend is because I was allotted ten minutes with an agent to pitch my book. The one that was chosen for me had a PHD in literature and I knew that was a strike I had against me. The day before I wrote out the speech I was going to give and practiced it over and over. Finally the Saturday came and I made the hour drive out to the convention center.

I got there several hours early and there was nothing up there. A few booths where people were trying to sell their books and seminars that were already full. I just took the time to make some phone calls, practice my speech and just try to be as mentally prepared as possible.

When my time came they corralled me into the dining area where the pitch sessions were to be held. They told me to pick someone else to practice on in the meantime, but no one would speak to me because they needed to be alone. I know how this is going to sound...but I fucking hate writers. Almost as much as agents.

So my name is finally called and I head back to where the agents are seated. When I approached mine, he didn't stand up for the handshake. He just sat back and said "What d'ya got?"

I knew in that instant that nothing I could say or do would convince him to buy my book, he'd already written me off. This threw me off guard and I mangled the speech I had tried desperately to memorize. He just sat back and stared through me. It was embarrassing.

After a few minutes of that, he began to tear everything down. He said I was too young, inexperienced. Nobody knew who I was. There's nothing about me that's particularly special, or stands out. He also said that if I wanted to help people, I should just go speak at schools. Then the handler tapped him on the shoulder, signaling that our time was up and I was ushered out.

The first 20 minutes I was utterly devastated. Then I got lost on my way home and had time to process what had just transpired. This guy has never read anything I have ever written. He took one look at me, heard me talk for two minutes and decided I didn't have "it". Last time I checked, writers tend to let their works speak for themselves. Yes, at some point I will have speak in front of a big group of people and I can always prepare for that when it comes. I am green at the business aspect of my craft, but that, last time I checked, was their fucking job. And I'm not known...yet, but I will be. I'm used to rejection, in more ways than most have even considered. But every single one of those is leading me somewhere that I want to be. And when I finally reach that plateau, I'll look down and yell proudly, "Suck it PHD boy."